Forums Pop Culture & MediaBookTok made me want a Black love story with a white guy and now my mom is confused lol

BookTok made me want a Black love story with a white guy and now my mom is confused lol

16 posts

Not gonna lie, BookTok has been messing with my head in the best way. I keep seeing these little edits and recommendations for interracial romance books, especially Black woman/white man stories, and now I’m lowkey obsessed. I live in Philly and I started reading one of those small-town romance books just because everyone on TikTok was crying over it, and now I’m like… why am I suddenly picturing my dating life as a chapter book? The funny part is I actually met a guy on Bumble a few weeks ago who fits the whole “book boyfriend” vibe in a ridiculous way. He works in graphic design, he’s from Jersey, he wears those thick glasses, and he keeps recommending music like he’s trying to curate my whole personality. My mom met him at Sunday dinner and was polite, but later she asked me, “So is this your TikTok man?” I almost choked laughing. I guess my question is, do y’all think all this media stuff makes dating outside your race easier, or does it create these expectations that nobody can actually live up to? Because part of me is enjoying it, but another part of me is scared I’m romanticizing a real person because the internet made him look dreamy.

Mar 7

137

3 replies

Tasha Williams

#1 · Mar 7

Your mom calling him your TikTok man is hilarious, I’m sorry lol. But seriously, I think the internet can create a vibe that’s cute at first and then kinda unfair to the actual person. I dated a white guy after seeing too many soft-launch couple videos, and I realized I had to stop expecting him to act like he was scripted by some romance author. Still, I don’t think it’s all bad. Representation helped me not second-guess my attraction. It just took me a minute to separate what I wanted from what I was seeing online.

Sarah M.BASIC

#2 · Mar 7

As someone who fell down the BookTok rabbit hole too, I get it. I’m in Houston and started reading all those interracial romance recs after my cousin sent me one during Christmas break, and suddenly I was comparing every date to fictional men who apparently know how to cook, apologize, and have perfect cheekbones. Ridiculous. But I do think it can help normalize things. It gave me language for what I wanted and made me more open. The key is remembering real people are gonna have weird habits, boring days, and bad texting skills.

Mike Hernandez

#3 · Mar 7

I’m a single mom in Baltimore and I met my boyfriend on Hinge, he’s white and I’m Latina, and honestly the media stuff made me less nervous at first. Seeing couples on TV, in romance books, and even on TikTok made me feel like I didn’t have to explain myself so much. That said, the fantasy can mess you up if you let it. Real love is not always cinematic. Sometimes it’s just him picking up your kid from school and asking if you need almond milk from Target.